Puppy Talk - Bonecall to Spirit
Friday, March 25, 2011 at 8:20PM 
Ara is a chef, a writer, a father who knows the pain of outliving his child. Spirit is, like every dog, a companion, a friend, family. He is also the one who gets to sit in the sidecar wearing goggles and a helmet that says "Bite Me."
Now my furkids are obsessed. Spirit is their hero and Ara is a god. Everything is "Spirit this," "Spirit that." So it's hardly surprising that they wanted to talk to Spirit.
Puppy Dog: Hey Spirit! We saw your video! So kewl, Dude!
Puppy Girl: Omigod! Sooooooo JEALOUS!
Puppy Dog: Don't be rude.
Puppy Girl: Well I am jealous! And you are too! Don't pretend you're not.
Puppy Dog: Shut up, I'm not talking to you. I'm talking to Spirit.
Puppy Girl: Uh, yeah, about that... how are we doing that, exactly?
Puppy Dog: The Collective Dogconscious.
Puppy Girl: The whatnow?
Puppy Dog: Never mind. It just works, OK? You can connect to Spirit if you concentrate hard and talk to him.
Puppy Girl: Are you winding me up?
Puppy Dog: No! Listen, a moment ago you talked to Spirit, right, just after I did?
Puppy Girl: Oh yeah... I did!
Puppy Dog: It's like that. It just is. You don't have to think about it.
Puppy Girl: Wow.... that's...
Puppy Dog: Sorry about the interruption, Spirit. My little sister can be---
Puppy Girl: THAT'S SO AWESOME!
Puppy Dog: AARGH! Why are you yelling? I was talking to---
Puppy Girl: SO AWESOME! SO AWESOME! THE KLEKTIV DOGSHUSS!
Puppy Dog: Ssh! I'm talking to Spirit!
Puppy Girl: Oh, right, sorry.
Puppy Dog: Where were we? Sorry again, Spirit, I---
Puppy Girl: HEY, SPIRIT! Where'd you get those goggly thingies? They look awesome! And the head cap thingy! Awesome! And you get to ride with your Dada and sniff everything and feel the wind in your fur and the sun on your head - well, not your head because of the hat thingy but the sun on your tail, definitely your tail - right? - and you get to go fun places and meet other dogs and see new things all the time! YOU'RE SO LUCKY!!! We can't even stick our heads out the moving den windows!
Puppy Dog: Yeah, she's right. Annoying, but right. We mostly go to the parks in the moving den. There are a few of them, but we pretty much know them now. Hell, half way there we know where we're going.
Puppy Girl: Yeah but there was that one time...
Puppy Dog: Yes. We went to see Mama and Dada's friends in Faraway.
Puppy Girl: Faraway! It was AWESOME!
Puppy Dog: [Whispering] I tell her that everywhere that isn't here is called Faraway because she---
Puppy Girl: What are you whispering about?
Puppy Dog: Nothing.
Puppy Girl: Are you saying mean things about me to Spirit?
Puppy Dog: No.
Puppy Girl: LIAR! Don't listen to him, Spirit! He's just mean and nasty because I can run faster than him and I get to the Lil Round Green Critter first and bring it back to Mama and then she throws it and we both run but I get to it first again and---
Puppy Dog: Will you stop blabbering?
Puppy Girl: Shut up!
Puppy Dog: No, you shut up. So, Spirit: Mama's promised us that she's going to show us more videos and read us your Dada's stuff about where you go and what you see.
Puppy Girl: And we're going to get a sidecar! Mama said! And Mama said we can have one each because I don't want to sit next to my mean old stinky brother!
Puppy Dog: OK, now you're just being silly. The only thing Mama said about a sidecar was that it made her feel like a drink.
Puppy Girl: How does a drink feel?
Puppy Dog: Oh for crying out loud! Feel like A drink! Like having a drink!
Puppy Girl: What's water got to do with all this? Mama said sidecar! I heard her! We're getting a sidecar each!
Puppy Dog: Look, Spirit, we'll have to chat when I'm alone. You can see what I'm putting up with here. Seriously, Dude, I envy you on the open road, ALONE with your Dada. Later.
Puppy Girl: Stop ignoring me! Mama said! She said sidecars!
Puppy Dog: So we're getting two sidecars, are we? Do you even know what a sidecar is?
Puppy Girl: It goes brmmmm-brmm. It has a thing on the side what you sit in. And a thing on the other side what I sit in. Brmmmm-brmm! Brmmmm-brmm!
Puppy Dog: Did you even WATCH the video?
Puppy Girl: You know I did! I was right there with you!
Puppy Dog: A sidecar is attached to a motorbike. You can't have two sidecards on a motorbike. Only one.
Puppy Girl: A motorwhatnow?
Puppy Dog: That's it. That's it! I'm going to bed.
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