That's Life - Collections

My dear friend, EverywhereEventually, wrote a blog post on things he has collected which, bizarrely, includes "Leather bookmarks from British stately homes."

So I began to think about things I have collected.

And here's what I came up with:

1. Wrinkles


2. Fat deposits


3. Shoes with heels so high I can't wear them


4. Intolerance for minor, petty things


5. Hair - in my hairbrush and in my shower plughole


6. Blocked follicles that turn into pimples wherever I depillate


7. Split finger nails


8. Athlete's foot bacteria


9. Dog hairs - all over my house


10. Chin hairs


11. Gaudy jewellery I don't like but won't donate to charity


12. Pretty blouses that are too small which I will "thin into in six months"


13. Hemarroids


14. Jeans which are too small which I will "thin into in six months"


15. A bikini I bought in a flash of insanity which I will never, ever wear


16. Odd socks


17. Certificates of this and that, including my First Communion


18. The entire works of Charles Dickens, in a box in storage in the UK, unread


19. Men who wanted to f#$k me but not have me as a girlfriend


20. Insecurities


21. Therapists


22. Antidepressants


23. Vitamins, supplements, powders


24. Massage therapists


25. Little samples of cosmetics/facial products which I never use


26. Out of date sunscreen sprays and creams


27. Old medecines which I can't remember what they were prescribed for


28. Scarves and pashminas


29. Lingerie I never wear


30. Adult pleasure toys I never use

I need that woman on British Telly to come and help me clean out my house. But I am not sure I'd want my lingerie and other unmentionables strewn on my front lawn. And what would the Red Cross do with my d$$$os?

Comments

[everywhereventually]

Your list makes me wish I had thought harder about my own...

The leather bookmark thing though is unique to the UK. I have never seen any anywhere else. But in all the shops of all the museums and stately homes in the UK, bookmarks with embossed scenes of the place are available alongside the erasers, keyrings and fridge magnets. When I was about 23 or so, as I packed for a flat move I wondered why I had kept them and got rid of all but 2, which I still use. I did have about 160!!

[Itty Bitty Crazy]

I see an Ebay opportunity missed...