Depression and ECT 3

I've suffered from depression since I was a pre-teen. In 2012 I got very sick, becoming suicidal. In 2013 I decided to try ElectroConvulsive Therapy. The "Depression" series of blog posts chronicles that process.

To start the Depression series at the beginning, click here: http://ittybittycrazy.squarespace.com/imported-data/2013/12/29/depression-1.html
#depression
#ECT

My headache after waking up was just a normal headache today.

The intake nurse kept poking me unsuccessfully in the arm until I eventually told her the previous nurse had put the IV in my hand, and she tried that. They put me on an IV before the ECT procedure to help with dehydration and the headache.

In the treatment room the psychiatrist made some quip about them being glad I came back, so I guess some patients have one treatment and then refuse to go through any more.

The procedure went much the same as before - no memory after the oxygen mask - and I came to in the recovery room. The nurse in the recovery room was very kind and reminded me that it will take a while before I feel the effects.

Ive been very resentful this afternoon and evening about Fluffy Bear going away this weekend. He wouldn't even think of doing that if I was having chemo. You could argue that this isn't that different. I know I agreed to him going away, but I didn't know how hard these treatments were going to be and I haven't even started with the memory loss yet.

I met a guy in the waiting room who said the memory loss had been the hardest part for him. He also said he's been having treatment since June which, seeing as we are now in December, is fucking petrifying. I pray I don't have to go for that long.