[ICYMI] Couch Potato - Showgirls

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

In case you missed it...

This is a repost.  This was originally posted Saturday, April 4, 2009 at 5:32PM.  But the thing with blogs is, new people find them all the time, and who the hell has the time to search through all the crap I've written in the past?  So, now and then, I'm gonna regurgitate some of it for you.  Think of it as happy vomit.

 

 

 

 

 

I recently saw the most misogynistic, facile, puerile piece of excrement ever to grace the movie screen.

 

Showgirls.

  

Here is a sample of the script:

 

Our "heroine", Nomi, is at lunch with her nemesis/mentor/potential lesbian lover, Cristal. Nomi is a new chorus dancer in the topless horror of a stage show, Cristal is the "star" who emerges, almost naked, from a fake volcano.

Nomi Malone: [befuddled by the fancy menu and sarcastically referring to the diet prescribed by the manager of the dance troupe] Don't they have brown rice and vegetables?
Cristal Connors: Do you like brown rice and vegetables?
Nomi Malone: Yeah.
Cristal Connors: You do?
Nomi Malone: Sort of.
Cristal Connors: Really?
Nomi Malone: It's worse than dog food. [Cristal laughs]
Nomi Malone: It is!
Cristal Connors: I've had dog food.
Nomi Malone: You have?
Cristal Connors: Mmm-hmmm. Long time ago. Doggy Chow. I used to love Doggy Chow.
Nomi Malone: I used to love Doggy Chow, too!
[Cristal and Nomi toast each other with their potato chips.]

And, trust me, the rest of it is even worse.

The only way to tolerate this piece of crap is to laugh at it, and that's what David Schmader does.  He is a Showgirls officionado, and gives live commentary throughout the movie.

At the moment pictured above, he said:

"There isn't enough Purell (hand santizer) in the world!"

Classic.