The Bucket List is a list of things I want to do/feel I should do before I die. I've done some of them already, and I'm telling one of those stories here. To see the whole list, click here.
I think everyone should experience a moment up on stage and, if possible, have it be in a play. Sure, you can get a sense of the stage experience from singing a song or dancing a dance in a school talent show, but it's not the same as a play.
There's something about the silences, inbetween the lines of dialog, that make it clear that you are 100% on your own up there and, if you forget a line or let a silence linger, it feels like a small death.
The spotlight is brightest in a play. There are few distractions to fall back on. In real life a passing truck might hide your fart while you're out on the street. In a play, if your stomach rumbles, everyone knows. Everything about it is completely self-conscious and yet must appear completely natural. And therein lies the gap you must fill, with acting talent. And it's bloody hard. But it's bloody exciting, too.
I've done, as I am sure you've figured out by now, various plays. None of them were professional - that would have taken a gift of consdierably more talent from the Gods than they deigned to bestow upon me. No, they were through drama club in Middle and High School.
In fact, the first time I was on the stage I was a little kid, probably 5 years old. One day some teachers came into our classroom and stood around, muttering, looking at all the children. I could feel it when their eyes lighted on me. I was called up to leave class and follow them. I was petrified.
It turned out they were putting on a play for Christmas and wanted to have children representing various countries walk up to the baby Jesus and offer him gifts. This was all to be on a stage in the middle of school track field, with parents sitting in the bleachers. Don't forget - I grew up in South Africa. December is the height of our summer.
Anyway, I had been chosen to fufill the role of an Indian lady, complete with Sari and Bindi on my forehead (the best part of the whole thing). You may not have seen me mention it before but I am from a mixed race background originating on a tropical island in the Indian ocean. Growing up in South Africa, officiallly classified as White in the Apartheid years, gained me many sideways compliements about my "lovely tan." Of course, they were barbed jabs at my mother who, standing at my side, shielded me from the bitchy innuendo and let me think I had gorgeous glowing olive skin.
I was so happy to be part of the pageant/play/whatever, that I didn't think about why I'd been chosen to represent India, and I dutifully waddled out clutching the folds of fabric wrapped around me that I thought were going to flutter away at any moment, and plonked a present at the foot of the manger. My first spotlight moment.
There were various other school and drama club plays over the years, but the one that stands out for me is playing the villain, Lorin Chillingsworth, in a delightful melodrama. I got to wear top hat and tails, say evil things and, most of all, flounce off the stage in a fit of pique once my dastardly plan had been thwarted.
As I stalked down the steps of the stage, heading to the exit, the audience laughed at my final joke, applauded and cheered.
I've never felt such a rush in my life.
Cheering! For me?
Delicious!
There's nothing like the feedback you get from a live audience when on stage. As much as the silences can stab you in the heart, positive feedback - laugther, clapping, even booing if you're the villain - are like mainlining a special drug that's part adrenaline, part SSRI, part whiskey. It's warm and buzzing and energizing and so very, very happy, all at the same time.
It's not the same buzz as winning at sport. That's your talent, your prowess, your team. On stage, it's just you. Naked. With a few lines to say, trying to say them in an enteratining way.
When it goes right, and the audience is with you, it's like a mental orgasm.
So put your daugther on the stage, Mrs Robinson, at least once.