Yesterday, on the way home from gym, I was in the go-straight-ahead lane, minding my own business, listening to the BBC World Service. On my left, in the left-turning-lane, was a white van.
The turning lane lights turned green, for him to turn left and for cars opposite him to turn to their left.
But the white van surged forward, lurched to the right and went straight ahead, narrowly missing a car on the other side of the road who was trying to turn.
My jaw dropped.
This arsehole had just almost caused a major accident, and done something so illegal it was mindboggling.
When the straight ahead lights turned green, I accelerated like a crazy person and, about half a mile down the road, I caught up with the van. Once again, it was in the left turning lane and I was going straight ahead.
I should add there that, in England, where the narrow roads and cost of petrol (gas) make it difficult to drive ridiculously large 4X4 trucks, workmen drive white vans. They are usually driving across London from one job to another, trying to make it through traffic as quickly as possible. They tend to drive like maniacs. Everyone hates them and tries to get the hell out of their way.
So you'll understand a little better, I hope, why my blood boiled at this idiot.
I hooted (sounded the horn) for about 45 seconds.
The van's white reverse (back up) lights came on, and it pulled up beside me. The driver was a young man, baseball hat (there's a shock) and, next to him, a young woman.
We were yelling at each other with the windows closed, but it didn't take a lipreading genius to see that he had yelled:
"What the FUCK is your problem?"
"You're going to kill someone!" I yelled back.
I started trying to gesture what I was saying, pointing at him and doing the sideways cut motion across my neck.
I suddenly realized that he might think I was saying I was going to kill HIM, so I wound down the window.
We yelled more of the same thing at each other.
I just kept repeating:
"You are going to KILL someone!"
Now the girlfriend got involved.
"What did he do?" she screeched.
Being under 30, they of course have ADD, and probably didn't realize that I was referring to something he had done over 60 seconds ago.
The girlfriend was sitting there, unlit cigarette in one hand, lighter in the other. She was pretty - in that hard, brittle way that strippers are. She had blonde hair with a horrible orange hue - a cheap and nasty dye job.
Finally, she threw what she obviously thought was her killer barrage:
"You should stop eating, because you're FAT!"
I thought of a retort, but decided to take the high ground. If I got personal, the driver wouldn't learn anything.
So I just kept repeating:
"You are going to KILL SOMEONE!"
What I should have said, of course, is:
"I can diet. You'll always be White Trash!"
But, let's face it, this is America, and people like that have guns.
And so I wound up my window and, seeing the light had turned green, drove away.
Hell is other people.
For more Hell is Other People - click here.