There are so many things I have to do that get in the way of me living a full, fun life. And I'm sick of them.
So I'm calling them out. I'm naming and shaming. I'm putting it out there.
These things are a waste of my time:
- Exercising to balance calorie burn with calorie intake
- Fast forwarding through TV ads
- Sleeping
- Having to earn money
- Hangovers
- Pooping
- Peeing
- Laundry
- House cleaning
- Being polite to neighbors I have no interest in knowing
- Stopping at 4 way stops when there are no other cars around
- Flossing
- Scooping dog poop
- Airport security
- Travelling to and from places
- Cooking
- Waiting for the kettle to boil
- Ironing
- Doing my own manicure or pedicure
- Being sick
Life is short. There are things to do!
Imagine all the things I could have done if only I didn't have to sleep. I could have learnt Spanish. Gong out clubbing all night with no after effects. Practiced yoga naked in the dark. Read that pile of books that's been sitting next to my bed for two years. Watched all the classic movies people refer to. Brushed my dogs' teeth. Hell, trained my dogs.
Add up all the time you've spent in the toilet in your life. Ten minutes a day? That's TWO HUNDRED AND TWO DAYS of your life wasted!
Those guys that write science fiction concentrate on all the wrong things. Never mind that everyone has perfect teeth, bodies and hair. Show us how we can not have to poop!
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