Every single female in the USA should watch I'm with Lucy.
This isn't a highbrow film. It's not Oscar material. But it's excellent education for any woman who is dating and wants to find the right man.
[Spoiler alert!]
Basically, Lucy has a very bad breakup, then dates 5 different men.
We know early on that she is going to get married, and we flash back to fragments of the dating, trying to guess which one she will end up with.
But here's why I think it's important.
This film details the compromise that most women have to make if she choose monogamous, heterosexual commitment.
Yes, yes. I know you will tell me that your man is different. He doesn't fit into one of these categories. He's got A and B and C and there's nothing else you would want, bla bla bla.
Well, my dear, pat yourself on the back. You're in the special 5%.
The rest of us have a choice to make.
Lucy's choices are the archetypes most of us, as women in America, have to choose between:
Man No. 1: Sweet, loving, sees you as an equal. Not afraid to make an ass of himself, and you laugh a lot together. He shows you new things, hobbies, but nothing too out there. He tries hard to please you and genuinely loves you. Your backgrounds are similar and so you have a common understanding. Sex will be nice, even good. Your family will like him. You'll be comfortable, but not rich. If there are any ups and downs, they're on an old-style wooden rollercoaster, not one of those newfangled ones with the flashing lights. Everything will be ok.
Man No. 2: Sensitive and sweet, this man will worship you. He's not afraid to cry, and not afraid to give his whole heart. Sex will be soft and sensuous, and he will be generous. He may even have a fetish or two. Intelligent and very well read, this man will have a very large book collection and not be particularly sporty. You'll never have screaming fights - you'll talk through things, sometimes ad nauseum. Not much passion, but a lot of tenderness.
Man No. 3: Great sex. Very different world view from you. Amazing sex. Opens your heart to art, or music, or theater. Experimental sex. Not much else in common. Mind-blowing sex. Not much conversation. He may very well like to have sex with people other than you. Still, when he comes home, it's incredible sex.
Man No. 4: A manly man. There will be body hair. Will make you feel safe, and feminine. He's into sports, beer, rock music. Innate sexism and probably other -isms. Conversation will only go so deep. Vivacious, virile, if vanilla, sex - assuming he hasn't pissed you off that day, of course. Will expect you to breed. Good, if conservative, father. Your daughter will probably rebel and be a goth.
Man No. 5: Mmmmm, a charmer. Intelligent. Educated. Good family - your mother in law will probably be a bitch. Works hard. Makes good money. You'll be sitting pretty. Maybe you won't even have to work. He'll be in damn good shape, and you better stay in shape too. Luckily he can pay for plastic surgery. Seeing as he's paying for everything, you better play ball. Subconscious sexism. You need to be the proverbial whore in the bedroom (clad in Victoria's Secret), chef in the kitchen (cooking a la Julia Child), maid in the living room (or at least know how to hire and direct cleaning staff), perfect hostess in the dining room (knowing Emily Post by heart), and model mama on the playground (clad in Lulu Lemon). One slip up and there'll be a younger model waiting in line to replace you. Try to marry without a prenup.
I've spoiled enough of the movie without telling you which one Lucy chooses.
I find the American dating ritual - where you keep your options open by seeing several people at once, like you are house-hunting or something - bizarre. Checklists, rules.
Loosen up, girls!
The point is, as my mother used to say, "Marriage is compromise."
And so is finding someone to marry in the first place.
So which man are you dating, Single American Woman, that you have disqualified because he only rated 8 out of 10?
Lucy actually says, at the end of the film, she's hasn't found the perfect man - she's found the right man.