6:00am - Wake up, decide I hate my alarm with a passion
6:02am - Take dogs out to pee
6:03am - Try to get Puppy Girl to poop
6:04am - Get barked at by an annoyed Puppy Girl
6:09am - Scoop poop, hit head on branch as I stand up
6:10am - Get Puppy Dog's food, herd Puppy Girl away with my right foot, let Puppy Dog eat
6:12am - Get Puppy Girl's food, try to keep her from scratching holes in my PJs as she repeatedly jumps up at me
6:13am - Get Puppy Girl to sit, after 4 attempts, for 0.5 seconds before I let her have her food
6:14am - Stand guard, making sure that the dogs don't eat each others' food
6:15am - Grab bowls off the floor before each dog runs to lick and sniff to see if the other one has left a nanocrumb of food behind
6:16am - Let Puppy Dog back through to the bedroom to go back to sleep
6:17am - Have breakfast and vitamins
6:20am - Spend some time playing with Puppy Girl. Wake Fluffy Bear up twice when I scream when she bites my hand too hard
6:35am - Put Puppy Girl on the bed with Fluffy Bear, shower
6:50am - Do hair and makeup
7:10am - Have crisis, deciding that the outfit I spent an hour choosing last night is all wrong
7:11am - Panic
7:12am - Panic
7:13am - Panic
7:14am - Panic
7:15am - Go through clothes, again and again, swearing, while trying to stop Puppy Girl from stealing the clean socks
7:30am - Decide on pants and a shirt, and get dressed
7:35am - Pick Puppy Girl up and throw her on Fluffy Bear's head, so that he has to get the hell up
7:40am - Make sure I have everything, try to stop Puppy Girl jumping up on my clothes with muddy paws. Fail
7:50am - Try to catch Puppy Girl to put her in her crate
7:55am - Finally tempt Puppy Girl close enough with a squeaky toy to catch her
8:00am - Hug Puppy Dog goodbye and leave the house
8:05am - Driven to work by a wonderful Fluffy Bear. Look worryingly at hill I have to climb to the bus stop tomorrow
8:07am - Try to convince Fluffy Bear to take me home so I can hide under the duvet. Fail
8:12am - Try to convince Fluffy Bear to drive to the Mexico border. Fail
8:15am - Arrive at office, decide I need coffee
8:16am - Walk round building, trying to find coffee shop. Fail
8:20am - Ask some guys smoking outside where a coffee shop is. They point me to a building which has a Starbucks
8:21am - Sigh, because I hate Starbucks soy lattes - why the hell do they use Vanilla Soy?
8:22am - Realize I have no time to get coffee anyway
8:23am - Stomp into my building
8:24am - Stand in elevator, not understanding why it isn't moving
8:25am - Realize that all floors except Reception require pass to be swiped in front of reader before you can push button, and I have been pushing floor 10 instead of Floor 15
8:26am - Realize that I have forgotten my watch and am wearing Fluffy Bear's wedding ring
8:27am - Check in at Reception, get pass, go to my floor
8:30am - Find that there is an espresso bar in the cafeteria. Ask new boss if I can get coffee
8:35am - First sip of coffee
8:36am - Sigh, for all is well